Lessons Learned in India

India strikes me as so normal it's weird.. so here's my list of lessons learned so far

1) always specify a delivery date in writing. I bought a dining room table and chairs on Feb 3, and they said 10 days to make it. 15 days later they still wouldn't specify an exact date. I had Satender, my driver, call them - because they never understand me - and he said that the only way to get them to pay attention was to go in person. I went, acted very disappointed, told them I wouldn't recommend the place to all my rich friends and then created a contract where if they are one day later than promised I get 5% off, 2 days = 10% etc.

2) People really don't expect you to be able to do anything yourself. And soon you can't. I've been taking my cat to the vet for routine immunizations and she threw up in the back of my car so I got home and went to wash it. Immediately someone's servent was called to help me (maybe my landlord's?). Since my housekeeper doesn't work on weekends, I have found myself almost unable to wash dishes and just pile them up for her. Silly - I was able to do them until now, I doubt I've forgotten how.

3) It's weird seeing white people. I went this weekend to Khan Market, which is essentially the expat market so it's overpriced and full of white people. I usually avoid it. I remember when I first got to India and lived in an Indian neighborhood, I saw a white guy one day and we waved, y'know 'cuz we're white. Turns out he was a religious converter guy who wanted me to join some Christian prayer group. Maybe that's why I avoid white people now.

4) I can get away with anything here, because people always assume I'm insane. Everything we white people do is so strange to most people here that there's no difference if you're actually weird. So with the vet appointments I've been shuttling my cat around in errands, to the ATM, grocery store, chemist (drug store). I can carry her into shops and around markets with no more weird stares than usual:)

5) Americans and Indians do not have the same taste in food. I'm getting much better about liking Indian food (maybe it's just because I don't eat it). One day a few years ago I offered the office driver some iced tea after helping me carry stuff on a very hot day. It was brewed iced tea with no sugar. He still tells people about this awful stuff I make. This weekend I made apple streusal muffins for a picnic and the picnic was cancelled, so I gave many away to the beggars. I think they reacted better than the driver, after all there is sugar but I think they were still disappointed. On the flip side, my Indian friends who have all spent plenty of time abroad, do appreciate the weird things I make, like cornbread.

6) I suck at hindi. I don't know why I can't seem to learn this language. I can talk enough to get around but not to hold actual conversations. I've started up lessons again but the teacher is average at best. I guess I'll keep plugging away - it eventually just has to seep into my brain, right?

7) India is changing - rapidly. It's amazing to see the changes just in the past year and a half since I was gone. Friday's newspaper said that all these Oscar-nominated films are coming, including Brokeback Mountain. I NEVER thought a gay western would open here. I saw a pirated version from Thailand over the weekend - makes me want to go camping in Montana (even though it's in Wyoming).